#HMB 320 - Gasparilla, Tampa Bay sex trafficking hoax & Tim Tebow finally bangs!

The Homemade Broadcast this week: Gasparilla is for amateurs, port-o-potty etiquette, Tampa Bay sex trafficking hoax & Tim Tebow finally gets it on! Get in touch with the show and leave a voice or text message at: (813) 693-2124 & visit HMBradio.com.

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The #HMB airs Sunday's on Radio St. Pete @ 6:10PM & Monday's at 10:15PM or on demand via your favorite podcast app, just search "HMBradio Tampa Bay". Leave a voice or text message for the show @: (813) 693-2124 or hit me up on our Facebook page or on twitter. Don't forget to tune into Stay Woke with Anna Hummel & myself weeknights after The Johnny B Show at midnight on 102.5 The Bone

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#HMBlog: St. Pete Mayor Kriseman: Rays "Shared City" Talks Are Over

ST. PETERSBURG, FLORIDA - The chatter of sharing the Rays with our neighbors to the north are over (at least for a few years). This afternoon Mayor Rick Kriseman issued a letter detailing the end of negotiations with the Rays for their “shared city” concept. In which, the Rays would have played half the season in St. Petersburg and half in Montreal.

Major Takeaways from the letter:

The Rays will abide by the current deal and will play at the Trop full time, at least until 2028.

The Rays declined an offer to allow them to look for stadium site in the Tampa Bay area.

Kriseman won’t use public funds to build a stadium for a part-time team, but will consider it for a full-time one.

"I continue to believe that the Rays Organization will come to determine that the Tampa Bay area, and specifically St. Pete, remains the best place to play baseball and to succeed in the long term," Kriseman said in the letter.

What do you think about the letter and the team staying put? Comment below.

#HMBlog: Stranger Things star David Harbour to speak at USF Tampa

David Harbour, who plays Sheriff Hopper on Netflix’s Stranger Things is scheduled to make a speaking appearance at the Marshall Center on the USF Tampa campus on November 20th. He is taking the place of Orange is the New Black star Laverne Cox who had to cancel due to filming conflicts. The topic of the talk hasn’t been revealed but if I had to make a guess I would bet it’s about how the President is a Nazi & how we live in trying times. I assume it will be a sanctimonious & finger wagging fest about how he is better and morally superior to you and the rest of the plebs; much like his now infamous speech at the SAG awards a few years back.

If getting scolded by a famous person on a show you like seems like a fun time then head on down to USF Tampa on the 20th. Doors open at 7:30PM. Seating is first come, first served and you can line up at early as 5:30PM. Current USF students are the only one’s eligible for RSVP.

#HMBlog: Patron alleges Pelican Pub benches gave her a massive skin breakout

In a public Facebook post, a St. Petersburg resident alleges what all of locals always new: Pelican Pub nasty as hell. Rachael Renn published a post on Facebook alleging that she contracted some sort of skin rash after sitting on the benches at the longtime St. Pete staple.

The comments are littered with other folks alleging the same thing happened to them and the post has been shared hundreds of times. I was there a few years back and I thought I was gonna diarrhea my pants, I walked into the bathroom and decided I would rather have a backseat full of doodoo then attempt to use that bathroom & I always assumed the rest of the place isn’t any cleaner. I’m happy to report that I didn’t poop my pants there or any other bars but I’m still young. ABC Action news were able to get a statement from the establishment:

“We’re are taking the claims made on social media over the past couple of days very seriously, and we are doing everything in our power to determine if something at our establishment might be causing this and if so, how to rectify it as soon as possible.

As a result, we have contacted the Florida Department of Health to ask for their assistance and we are working with them to provide them with whatever they might need. We are scheduled to meet with them at 1:30 p.m. today.

Our pub has been operating in St. Petersburg for 10 years, and the bench in question has been in place for nearly five years.

Last month, we received the first and only formal complaint that we are aware of from a patron related to a potential rash. The Florida Department of Health came out shortly thereafter, and we worked with them at that time to provide them whatever they needed. Following their visit, they gave us the all clear with no conclusive results or findings.

We wish Rachael and any others affected by this unfortunate situation a speedy recovery and we want to thank her for bringing this to our attention. If this matter is being caused by something in or near the environment of our pub, we will work as quickly as possible to remedy the situation and ensure this doesn’t happen again.

Thank you to all of our guests and patrons for their continued loyalty and support.”

#HMBlog: Pasco man called 911 to report roommate for stealing $20 worth of weed

Pasco County, FL - Ah, Pasco County, the Florida of Florida if you will. The cops certainly earn their paycheck over that way, I’ll tell you what. A few ago actress Stacey Dash was arrested there for smacking her bitch up. This past weekend a man called 9-1-1 to report his roommate for stealing $20 worth of pot from him and a deputy live-tweeted the whole things because we live in the best and worst timeline simultaneously:

Someone called dispatch because his weed was stolen. Deputy Zalva is making contact. #TweetAlong pic.twitter.com/eDTZv8YhiD

— Pasco Sheriff (@PascoSheriff) October 13, 2019

Deputy Zalva did a follow up tweet after the confrontation with the man who kept calling 9-1-1, surprisingly the man wasn’t very agreeable to everyone’s shock.

Update on our welfare check and the previous call of someone’s drugs being stolen! #TweetAlong pic.twitter.com/2ijaXZgGxf

— Pasco Sheriff (@PascoSheriff) October 13, 2019

Pasco, we love you like our perpetually day-drunk and racist Uncle we see on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Thanks for making the rest of the state look good by comparison.

#HMBlog: Buccanners OL Alex Cappa Breaks Arm in 2nd Quarter, Plays Whole Game

There’s tough and then there’s Alex Cappa. Cappa broke his arm in the 2nd Quarter in the loss to the New Orleans Saints on Sunday but never came out of the game. Initially, he said it was just a bruise but Head Coach Bruce Arians' confirmed it was a broken arm:

“I have to commend Alex Cappa. He broke his arm in the second quarter and played the entire game,” Arians said. “He’ll miss a few weeks.”

Alex Cappa broke his left arm on this play. There was nine minutes left in the 2nd quarter. He FINISHED THE GAME. Unreal toughness. #Bucsfilm2019wk5 pic.twitter.com/uJ3eKnjPyJ

— Steven Cheah (@StevenCheah) October 8, 2019

That’s the type of man all of us strive to be. My grandfather died as a young man because his Appendix exploded and he didn’t go to the hospital because he thought he’d just shake it off, what a freaking badass. Meanwhile, my knee hurts and I will happily tell anyone about it who will allow me to bitch and complain to them for a little while. Sorry, guys.

#HMBlog: 'Clueless' star Stacey Dash arrested for Domestic Battery in Pasco County

New Port Richey- Florida: Ugh, as if! (sorry) Actress Stacey Dash, best known for her roll as ‘Dionne’ in Clueless was arrested last night in New Port Richey on a domestic violence charge. According to the Pasco County Sheriff’s Office, the incident happened at an apartment on Avana Way just before 8 p.m. Deputies say 52-year-old Dash got into a verbal argument with a man, presumably her husband Jeffrey Marty a local attorney practicing in Tampa Bay. An arrest report says Dash pushed the victim and slapped him in the face. The victim suffered red scratch marks on his arm from being pushed. There’s even a video of the arrest, isn’t the Internet great and awful all at once?

Things have certainly been better for Stacey, after a few years as a FOX News contributor she tried her hand at running for public office in California but dropped out of the race after a month. You have a better shot of reviving Alicia Silverstone’s career than running as a Republican in Southern California & winning. Although, now living in New Port Richey as opposed to Hollywood is a good indicator of how far things have fallen for her. It could be worse though, she could be living in Port Richey…

#HMBlog: Buccaneers’ Kicker Matt Gay get's trolled by a woman's deodorant company.

If there’s anything we have learned over the past few years it’s that women can do anything men can do & do it better & to say that isn’t true is a hate crime! Buccaneer’s Kicker Matt Gay continued to play out the years long Tampa Bay Great Kicking Curse last week against the Giants, missing a 34 year game winning kick at the end of the game. It was a heart-breaker but nothing Buccaneer fan’s are not familiar with at this point. In fact Secret, a deodorant for woman that I have used a few times and works pretty well to be honest, put a full page ad in the Tampa Bay Times trolling the rookie Kicker and implying that perhaps US Soccer’s Carli Lloyd could have made that kick. No problem, she hit a un-defended 55 yard kick over the summer at a Eagles-Ravens practice. Matt Gay hit a 55 yarder on his first NFL kick against the Pittsburgh Steelers during the preseason and set the record long for Field Goals kicked at Heinz Field & at college in practice, Lou Groza Award winner made a 62-yarder that ‘would have been good from 70’.

Whatever, MAN, step aside, a lady is here to show you how it’s done! Long overdue if you ask me. Secret is here to tell you the truth and it’s time you all listened:

“Hey Bucs fans, do you sweat 34-yarders? Carli Lloyd doesn’t.

Secret believes strength is more than overcoming what makes us sweat. It’s continuing to pursue progress and equality in all industries and sectors. Women may not play professional football (yet), but isn’t it time for a level playing field wherever she wants to play?”

The NFL has no rule about women playing in the league as far as I know. Lloyd was even offered a tryout. I think Buccaneer fans would take whoever could make kick’s consistently no matter what was between their legs. My only concern would be when a Kicker is forced to make a tackle, which happens from time to time in the game. Let’s go to the tape:

Yikes…good luck, gals.

#HMBlog: Study finds that Tampa Bay is polluted with 4 billion particles of microplastic

The University of South Florida - St. Petersburg in collaboration with Eckerd College released a study this week estimating 4 billion particles of microplastics swirling around in our local waters, these microplastics are small, less then 1/8 an inch and they breakdown from larger waste like water bottles & plastic bags. St. Petersburg has been active in banning plastics, by 2020 an ordinance will go into effect that will eliminate plastic straws and the distribution of Styrofoam products.

According to USA TODAY, the top plastic polluters in the world are: China, Indonesia, the Philippines, Vietnam, Sri Lanka and Thailand. So it’s a nice gesture but unlikely do actually do much in the long run to keep plastics out of the waters. Read more about the study here, I’m going to go have a coffee served in a paper cup and will disintegrate in my hands half way through.

#HMBlog: Clearwater Mayor George Cretekos calls for "assault" weapons ban

Clearwater Mayor Geogre Cretekos made national news this week after calling for an “assault” (I don’t know what this means) weapons ban of “military style” (scary looking) weapons and high capacity magazines because he went to church and prayed and it didn’t work.

“I’ve gone to church, I’ve prayed, My prayers aren’t working.”

— George Cretekos

That’s a brave stance and one that usually comes from someone who has never bothered to learn more about this style of rifle but instead has a knee jerk reaction based on emotion. Mass shootings are in the news constantly and you would think that violence was on the rise, it’s not but it is reported on more because these types of stories get clicks and clicks equal ad-revenue.

It could also be that God isn’t listening or perhaps isn’t there at all. Maybe it’s because you’re in Clearwater and you’re praying to the wrong God. Clearwater, as we all know answers to the mighty Xenu, the dictator of the "Galactic Confederacy". Hell, maybe try Buddha or something while you’re at it. One of them is bound to hit and all our problems will be solved and we will live in peace and harmony forever without “assault” weapons (or until Xenu comes back to enslave us).

#HMBlog: Kwon Alexander returns to Tampa Bay, gets ejected for a hit & then gets a game ball?

It was a short return for former Buc, Kwon Alexander, it didn’t even last a quarter. Alexander was ejected for a helmet to helmet shot on Buc QB Jameis Winston (whose name I still have to look up how to spell every dang time I mention him). Let’s check out the tape:

Yikes, I’m going to blame at least 2 of Jameis’ interceptions (he threw 3 yesterday) on that hit, his brain was definitely compromised on that one. Look, I don’t think Kwon did it on purpose but to add insult to injury, the 49ers game him a game ball for his effort. For you nerds who don’t know what that means it’s just an acknowledgement by the team for their effort, a trophy.

“I got down late. I gave myself up and he’s just playing football. It’s tough to finish to get out of the way, and fortunately we try to protect the quarterback in this league.”

— Jameis Winston on hit

It was an unfortunate accident and no doubt Alexander will be fined by the league for bursting a few of Jameis brain cells. I think the league should just institute a tit for tat type of element. Jameis should just be able to slap Kwon in the face and all will be forgiven like Pam did to Michael in “The Office”.

via Gfycat

The Buccaneers look to bounce back after that smackdown this Thursday against the Panthers. I can’t wait to see what Cam “Lady Gaga” Newton will be wearing this week but it’s sure to be hilarious.

#HMBlog: Scammer exploits Hurricane Dorian by assuming local weatherman's identity.

Nothing brings out the best in people more than a Natural Disaster that causes mass-destruction. Somehow, we are able to forget who your neighbor voted for when something like that happens and our natural born compassion tends to be unearthed. Maybe these things should happen more often if only for the fact…

However, these same events tend to also bring out the worst of our nature too. Some schmuck inevitably decides to exploit that compassion and try to scam somebody. That happened this weekend when Denis Phillips, meteorologist at ABC here in Tampa Bay shared a Facebook post where it would seem his identity was co-opted for the cause of separating a fool with their money.

These folks who try to tend to try this crap tend to be only slightly brighter than the actual people who fall for this stuff but still, it happens. Just remember that no one, especially a local weatherman is going to cold-call over Facebook to get donations for something like this. Never. If you want to donate to Hurricane Dorian relief there are legit charity’s like the American Red Cross & others. Be smart or at least a functioning adult- keep your head on a swivel.

#HMBlog: Pete Davidson scolds University of Central Florida students over their filming during his show.

Pete Davidson has had a tough go the past few years. He was suicidal over his break up with Ariana Grande, felt the fallout from a joke about Congressman Dan Crenshaw and his war injury and most recently he scolded some UCF kids this past weekend over filming on their phones when there was a strict no-cellphone rule.

“That’s what’s fucked up. You were the one filming. That’s right, we’re embarrassing. That’s why the world is going to end in 25 years because you’re all fucking retarded. I meant it that way, idiots. You should fucking grow up. It says no phones. … You’re just supposed to just like behave. I have to have my boy patrol you guys like you’re 5 years old? That’s fucking embarrassing.

You should grow up. Where’s the next generation? … Don’t you want your parents to be proud of you? … Now we’ll continue.”

— Pete Davidson at UCF

Ironically, some student got the scolding on video and uploaded it to YouTube:

Many comedians have decided not to perform for college students anymore. Jerry Seinfeld has advised fellow funny-people to avoid campuses altogether. Aside from some hurt feelings from the kids who took to Twitter the real problem emerged, Pete used the “R WORD” which has become a big time no-no. Tom Segura faced severe backlash for using the word during his last special “Disgraceful” (which was fantastic & if you’re a comedy fan you should check it out).

The University of Central Florida put out a statement in they found the event “disappointing”:

“Mr. Davidson’s abusive language, particularly his use of a derogatory slur, is contrary to the University of Central Florida’s values of inclusion and respect for all. It’s disappointing that his rant spoiled an event that was meant to welcome students back for the fall semester.”

— UCF

So, I think you can expect some heat to head Pete’s way over a word with a dictionary entry that actually means something & not so much for him calling a bunch of brats “brats”. We live in a retar…stupid time.

#HMBlog: XFL releases team names and logo's, Tampa Bay will be called the "Vipers"

After a long wait the resurrected XFL football league named it’s team names, logos and colors this afternoon and our hometown squad will be called the Vipers. They released the info on Twitter this afternoon:

Hunters by instinct. Cold-blooded by nature.

Luring all who challenge them into the jaws of defeat.

Ready to strike February 2020: The Tampa Bay Vipers. #XFLTeams pic.twitter.com/ziN4DDx47Q

— XFL (@xfl2020) August 21, 2019

The other team names announced on Wednesday: New York Guardians, Dallas Renegades, Houston Roughnecks, Los Angeles Wildcats, St. Louis BattleHawks, Seattle Dragons and D.C. Defenders.

The Vipers will be “ready to strike” in February 2020 and will play it’s home-games at Raymond James Stadium.

#HMBlog: Alligators in Florida are an existential threat...

Floridian’s are a rare breed, we live in a state that wants us dead. The wildlife here is just that- wild. Our human garbage is up there with the best in the world. Florida Man is beloved nationwide spawning numerous social media accounts to tell the tale of our beloved state. Lately, Alligators have been in the news a lot. Technically the Florida Panther is our state animal but I think that when people think of Florida, they think the Gator…

A few months back a Gator broke into some woman’s home in Clearwater causing a bunch of damage and I thought, “huh, that’s crazy” but I’m starting to thing these beasts may be becoming an existential threat…

Last week, with all the heavy rain there was some reptile asswipe playing in the middle of Gandy Blvd. in St. Petersburg…

I thought, “wow, that’s crazy…” and then I’m scrolling though social and I see some menacing looking cold blooded killer climbing a fence in Jacksonville and I thought, “wow, we’re toast”. I used to be worried about civil unrest being the biggest threat to society but now I’m worried about these dinosaurs becoming self-aware, check out the video…

So yea, we’re dead. Kiss your loved ones and say your goodbyes before these killing machines obtain an AR-15 and start shooting illegal fireworks at us for laughs.

#HMBlog: Oaf of a security guard makes the best tackle so far at Buccaneer Training Camp...of a toddler.

Kids will be kids and oafish security guards will be oafish security guards. Yesterday at Buccaneer Training Camp a kid and an oafish security guard found this out first hand. The youngster ran out onto the practice field as kids are want to do and was captured shortly after by an oafish security guard who made the tackle of the year on the young man. @Rickelodeon23 was able to capture it all on video, so let’s go to the tape!

pic.twitter.com/ueOD8Ntuwz

— Ricky Schaefer (@Rickelodeon23) August 12, 2019

Oof, poor little fella…and poor oafish security guard. That’s why you always have to keep your head on a swivel, boy! Consider this a valuable lesson learned…

#HMBlog: Largo: Dude heckles German wrestler at a WWE NXT event with a certain salute & the Internet reacts as you think they would.

I watched wrestling when I was a youngster. I survived the WWF’s Attitude era for God’s sake. Things are different though now, Donald Trump is the President & everyone is racist and stuff so people tend to be a little more sensitive these days. Marcel Barthel is a wrestler for WWE NXT which I guess is like the minor leagues of wrestling. He is not a Nazi I am told and only looks a bit like one. This past Saturday WWE NXT held their show at Minnreg Hall in Largo and some doofus threw up the Nazi salute at him as he entered the ring. This obviously went over as good as a fart in church and people got pissed, including Marcel who demanded the guy be thrown out. Other people took to Twitter (of course) to virtue signal their dismay:

Hey @WWENXT - please ban this fan from #NXTLargo and any future events under the @WWE umbrella. There is no room for Nazi salutes in this world. pic.twitter.com/c1TvERWp34

— Kyle (@FLWrestlingFan) August 4, 2019

So, yea, what an idiot. I don’t know what is in this dudes heart but if I had to bet, I would go with it was a joke that didn’t land and he was just messing around. There will be some people out there though that will reach the conclusion that this man is an actual Nazi and we should punch Nazi’s (or at least throw milkshakes at them as some irresponsible journalists have advocated for). So this poor moron’s face is all over the internet now (yes, this blog is part of the problem but shrug emoji) and I hope he doesn’t get murdered for his dumb joke but I guess that would make me a Nazi sympathizer & apologist…

#HMBlog: What the hell are those lights on the Skyway Bridge?

The Skyway Bridge is getting a makeover, it’s part of the Bridge Lightning Project and has an aim on both safety and aesthetics. The Florida Department of Transportation is in the process of adding 1,800 LED lights along the length of the bridge.

We want them to be proud of the bridge. We maintain this bridge, it's going to be around for another 50-75 years. Any new bridge that is built, lighting is already included and this bridge never had lighting, so this is just going to be really a signature bridge for the state of Florida. It’s going to be beautiful. -Kim Carson, Spokesman for the FDOT

The project is now in the final phases and they expect it to be complete this fall. The 15 million dollar price tag on it was paid for by toll fees according to Bay News 9.

Let’s be honest here though, it’s really just so authorities can find the bodies easier after another person jumps…

#HMBlog: St. Pete City Council Extends the Firestone Grand Prix of St. Petersburg Until 2024

The Firestone Grand Prix of St. Petersburg has been a huge success for the city & it continues to grow every year. I rode my bike down there for the last one and the streets were so packed it made me nauseous. You used to be able to go right up to the fence and kind of watch the cars go by for free if you’re cheap like me but they had it locked down this time, you couldn’t see anything unless you paid for a ticket and as much as I think it’s a cool event, I’m just not interested in watching a car go in a circle enough to pay to watch it. A lot of people are though so good news for you freaks. St. Pete City Council inked an extension to keep the Grand Prix in St. Pete until 2024. So unless you live downtown and have to hear these loud machine-beasts start belching sound for prelims at 7AM on a Saturday morning you’re probably pretty amped. This can be particularly problematic if you’re brutally hungover from the night before and then you’ll curse it’s existence but lucky enough for me, I got priced out of downtown and can enjoy my hangover in peace a bit more uptown. It’s a good amount of revenue for the city though and it is a cool event so whatever.

Here are the dates set for the next five races:

2020 race event: March 12-15

2021 race event: March 11-14

2022 race event: March 10-13

2023 race event: March 9-12

2024 race event: March 7-10

#HMBlog: ‘Daisy Mae,’ beloved horse of Tampa Bay Buccaneers rookie LB Devin White passes away

Sad news this weekend, Daisy Mae, Devin White’s favorite horse died from dehydration. He took to Facebook to share the news with fans:

That’s a bummer, man. Some good news for Devin though, he finally inked his first professional football contract this past Saturday, a 4 year deal. We’re happy to have you in Tampa Bay, Devin, and I hope cashing those fat checks can be some consolation. The Buccaneers open Training Camp on July 25th.